my hands are small, i know

JaimeBaxter.gif
e-male: clicked the link you shared and it went to a cam show.
me: haha – it should have gone to my stream but you prob caught me on a brake or in a show – i do yoga in the afternoons on there
e-male: When I looked around the page..didnt look like yoga…
me: no – its a sex site but i can broadcast whatever i want – so i use it to infuse a little yoga and breathing into the site – the guys aren’t gonna go looking for it ;)

e-male: lol…sometimes i wonder…what exactly are you trying to do

me: if the media and society can create harmful fetishes i can help create other options
i know its hard to see because i’ve never seen it done before – but god is leading me – he understands complexity and that’s hard to convey to people so attached to their simple triggers
 usually takes people a few years to catch on to me but to most i’m sure i’m a circus wreck
e-male: i mean…i get your final motive…
but isnt that a very long and round about route to getting people to understand your motive and hence your objective?
me: i can’t just talk the talk – you have to walk the walk too ;)
otherwise things stay the same – just another story
e-male: hmmm…youre thought process is way more complex than I can comprehend.
never the less…i find that challenging…
me: i could sit on a pedestal and order people around – i don’t want to create robots – that’s where we are stuck
e-male: cause its only rarely i come across people who provoke me at a thought level
i dont think people are like robots
i think they are selfish monkeys
me: well cool :) i’m honored to mind fuck you lol
 because they are trained to be that way
e-male: lol…
i always felt the best way to screw them is to mind fuck them
me: hard to do with such little mind to fuck with ;)
e-male: lol
with me..youll get a larger than average mind to fuck…
but i dont know if it will appease your appetite :P
me: big boy huh? lol

e-male: yeah…a big mind.

me: that’s a great thing to have especially if its not crowded with other peoples junk
e-male: in my pants…perhaps not so big…haha
me: most all guys think they are small – that’s a conditioned reaction too
e-male: honestly…i think im alright.
but then i shouldnt blow my own trumpet right?
me: you should! confidence is the sexiest thing a man can wear
if there was a brain porn site instead of a visual what type of things would you want the girls to talk about?
e-male: ideas
connect different thoughts…
try and connect something from
weather to architecture…to how it can influence moods…to mind control projects…to psychology…to health…to medicine..to exercise…to work..to success…to what life should be and then go back to 0
me: sounds like my chat room
i think a lot of guys that go to the cam sites because they get visually stimulated think that they need to visually stimulate women too – but for me i see beyond looks and they don’t really affect me but how someone treats and holds themselves always shows in the physical – if men worked more on their character that would make them more attractive rather than trying to offer what they like from women – they mostly like cams for the attention but the only way to get true and meaningful attention is with action – not stories or images

e-male: for me…the only way i get excited is by an active imagination

me: are you a porn type guy? or what do you do in that situation?

e-male: not that i dont watch porn

i would get a hard on if i saw an attractive girl moaning or playing with herself…but that mood lasts for a few minutes.
but then…if a girl has a very active mind…imagination…consideration
ability to step into the other persons shoes
that would make me really attracted to their personality
me: why do you think that is?

e-male: because for me…the first is simply an animal

the second is a real human being who can think
people can fuck donkeys…
but then…sex is beautiful when you have it with someone with whom you can connect to on an emotional and psychological level.
me: why does the thinking turn you on? just looking for a male response

e-male: sorry…turn me on with the thinking part might not have been the right phrase.

I get attracted to.
me: same thing on a lower concentration

e-male:  of course…a girl who can think of what to do..sexually…and engage in an impromtu conversation would definitely be a turn on

cause…i find it find it difficult to people with whom i can sit and talk to.
my friends are usually twice my age.
me: there ya go – improv skills – people get frozen these days when they have to react without a stock or preemptive response. it stops the energy flow and things get stagnant and stale

e-male: i love to be unprepared

else…i could as well use a hand job
me: most people suck at improvising – you can see it in Facebook comments – its the relationships and families that suffer the most – so i go where its juicy
e-male: honestly…from a mental level…me and my wife arent compatible. she doesnt get most of what i say and my mom says..Socrates and his wife never got along. It wasnt his wife’s fault. He was just too complex in his ideas that he could never simplify it for her
me: i can feel him on that

e-male: thing is…when we started off…we were in a similar situation…so it kinda clicked…

me: i can’t find a guy who’s up to my level intellectually – i wish it didn’t matter but i want to have someone capable of appreciating me

e-male: ive found a few women like that…

but then…they were near 50 or more
me: men get stuck in the material cycle and never budge – we develop and have no partners lol
i don’t want this for the girls in my family – if i can awaken a small number of men to give to anyone coming up in my shoes then ill feel a little better

e-male: but in general…i dont find people who can appreciate me mentally

i keep telling…we should all evolve constantly…else well die uselessly
and evolve doesn’t mean buy a toyota camry this year and buy a bentley in the next.
its the thought process that should change.
me: so silly – none of that is impressive – especially when its tougher for some to acquire the same – they just end up looking like pageant queens to me

e-male: ive paid a big price to set things straight and after 28 years…my dad and mom can see and understand what ive been trying to tell them. now they support me and help me fine tune my ideas with their experience

me: thats great – i’m still working with my mother lol
e-male: im working on my self
to be a better son
better brother, uncle, husband, friend etc
i find it easier to give than to take.
cause if i take…i feel obliged in some way or the other…and then i need to match it up…
if im the first to give…i can be at peace that i gave my best…
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